Be willing to share your fears and feelings, and quick to acknowledge your mistakes. Let her melt into her feminine softness as she knows she can trust you fully. If you focus on what bugs you, all you will see is reasons to be bugged. Always see the best in her Focus only on what you love.
Be willing to take her sexually To carry her away in the power of your masculine presence, to consume her and devour her with your strength, and to penetrate her to the deepest levels of her soul.
1. be psychotically optimistic about love.
Not because I regret my decision, but because that is exactly what a marriage needs to be - and what mine had no real chance of being. Women don't behave that way. Keep that space always ready to receive her and invite her in, and refuse to let anyone or anything else enter there. Boys and girls generally bare the biggest burden as this entitlement cycle, hence disharmony, continues in their own relationships.
And make her laugh.
2. make sure you are healed before you start dating.
I stumbled across your article while trying to learn some things about my own separation from my husband of 11 years. You were attracted to this woman because she was the person best suited to trigger all of your childhood wounds in the most painful way so that you could heal them… when you heal yourself, you will no longer be triggered by her, and you will wonder why you ever were. Take full ability You are responsible for finding your own happiness, and through that your joy will spill over into your relationship and your love.
When you feel those feelings take time to get present and to look within and understand what it is inside of YOU that is asking to be healed. I just want to move forward, and there are days like today where you can watch the bricks in the wall of your life begin to fall down.
Is utter and complete selflessness the goal?
Learn some of the cues you need to be aware of.
Love will always endure. Find common goals, dreams and visions to work towards.
If you are reading this and find wisdom in my pain, share it those those young husbands whose hearts are still full of hope, and with those couples you may know who may have forgotten how to love. Marriage is life, and it will bring ups and downs. Try not to make too big of mistakes, and learn from the ones you do make.
The advice in this article can be applied to both genders. Embracing all of the cycles and learning to learn from and love each experience will bring the strength and perspective to keep building, one brick at a time.
If this is the guiding principle through which all your choices is governed, there is nothing that will threaten the happiness of your marriage. Laughter makes everything else easier. Truth is, I loved being marriedand in time, I will get married again, and when I do, I will build it with a foundation that will endure any storm and any amount of time.
Your woman deserves that from. There is no greater challenge, and no greater prize. Helped and encouraged thousands, infuriated few. And I have found, through my two very serious relationships, that the guy will always, always side with his best friend female rather than siding with his woman. Love yourself fully, love the world openly, but there is a special place in your heart where no one must enter except for your wife.
Never blame your wife if you They are YOUR emotions, and your responsibility. Go figure. Change will come, and in that you have to re-choose each other everyday. Never stop growing together The stagnant pond breeds malaria, the flowing stream is always fresh and cool. Protect your own heart Just as you committed to being the protector of her heart, you must guard your own with the same vigilance. Sometimes she will need to fly from your branches to go and find what feeds her soul, and if you give her that space she will come back with new songs to sing.
Focus to the point where you can no longer see anything but love, and you know without a doubt that you are the luckiest man on earth to be have this woman as your wife. Rather than pushing through the thigh deep waters, they get to a point of "it's all too hard" and walk away. You will make mistakes and so will she. Figure out ways to leverage both persons strength to win.
Be present Give her not only your time, but your focus, your attention and your soul. We read letters from women in Malaysia comforting women in England. One of those men may be like I was, and in these hard earned lessons perhaps something will awaken in him and he will learn to be the man his lady has been waiting for. But these are lessons I am learning and committed in carrying forward.
And I thought to myself, "Maybe it's me. Of coarse all of which is only IMO. I haven't married yet, but have been in relatonships that have been very close - it seems to me the guy marches, when the going gets tough. Check out these coming-of-age love stories from the male perspective by James Russell Lingerfelt.
She is. She needs that space to renew and get re-centered, and to find herself after she gets lost in serving you, the kids and the world. Listen to what she is really saying behind the words and emotion. Give her space The woman is so good at giving and giving, and sometimes she will need to be reminded to take time to nurture herself. Forgive immediately Holding onto past mistakes that either you or she makes, is like a heavy anchor to your marriage and will hold you back.
About the author
Atrophy is the natural process when you stop working a muscle, just as it is if you stop working on your relationship. They will see things through to the bitter end, sometimes at their own expense, and expect their man to walk beside them. Okay, getting a little too poetic here, but you get the point.
I came to very similar conclusions after my divorce 16 years, 10 month and 24 days of marriage. In the end, this is the only advice you need. Maybe I asked for too much, maybe I should have been happy just to have been married.
Cut the anchor loose and always choose love. It never helps when teammates fight. This is the most important and sacred treasure you will ever be entrusted with. Fall in love over and over again You will constantly change.
See details below. Treat her as you would your most valuable client.
Beautiful advice from a divorced man after 16 years of marriage
This article was first published by my friend Gerald Rogers as "My advice after a divorce following 16 years of marriage. The unity and compassion among people which this article brought forth was a beautiful experience to witness. I hope more people can take your advice and apply it to their own marriages, before it's too little too late. And a commitment to grow together and a willingness to continually invest in creating something that can endure eternity. These are lessons I learned the hard way. Never stop courting Never stop dating.
What you focus on will expand. Always fight to win her love just as you did when you were courting her. These are lessons I learned too late. My advice after a divorce following 16 years of marriage, by Gerald Rogers. Through that work, the happiness will come. Once a guy has had enough, it's done. For a male to be inspired to walk over broken glass so to speak to bring his female what she wants and needs from her man or simply just to be a better man, she 'first' needs to show appreciation, affection and acceptance of her man for being who he is What we have today are women and society doing the opposite Gerald Roger sucking-up advice to men only perpetuates the sense of entitlement to women.
Ask her to create a list of 10 THINGS that make her feel loved and memorize those things and make it a priority everyday to make her feel like a queen.